lavished with love

I thought Brennan Manning’s talk tonight was really great. Those of you who went, I would love to hear your thoughts about what he said. Although I had read his book entitled The Ragamuffin Gospel (which is in essence a longer, more intimate version of his talk tonight–well worth reading, by the way), just having him reiterate God’s profound, unending, deep, UNCONDITIONAL love for us was freeing, reassuring, and peace-giving.

I loved hearing Brennan’s testimony about how he was down-and-out–literally on the street–and his recognition that God loves him precisely the same then as he does now. It makes me thankful that I can experience the same redeeming love through the mistakes I’ve made (and will make in the future).

One thing that got me thinking though (and I briefly talked with Shane, Curt & Debbie about this on the way home)… If God loves us unconditionally, even if we are lazy, dirty, jobless, irresponsible, drug-using slobs who have no goals in life, and we take Brennan’s quote and say, “God loves me for who I am, and not for who I’m supposed to be,” where does that leave us in personal responsibility to change our circumstances? Do I have to? Can I remain lazy and hopeless and still love God? Or do I respond somehow and turn myself around into a productive, showered, working, responsible, sober human being? Would God want me to do that? What’s my motivation for doing so, anyway? It’s obviously not for God to love me, for I know He already does. Is that how I show that I love Him?

I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments. Also, it makes me think about the things I would like to change about myself. Although I have been productive these past couple of weeks I’ve been on leave, I struggle with being lazy at work. I procrastinate and waste time doing useless tasks when I could be doing things of substance. In addition, I’m physically inactive. And I’m not just talking about during my pregnancy. I know that my body is a temple of the Lord and I have not treated it as such. I’m sure I could be in much better physical health. I think I suffer from a general lack of self-discipline. Prayer is another struggle.

The list goes on. But the question remains: if God loves me as I am right now, what is to inspire me to make changes for the better? A good question to ask, and a timely one also… I’m sure we can all think of changes we want to make in ourselves this year. It’s a new year and a new opportunity to set goals and turn over a new leaf for 2007. So think about these questions and let me know what you think!

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